President Trump's speech in San Juan.
"But I consider it a great honor, maybe because I know so many people from Puerto Rico that are such great people—I come from New York.
"Puerto Rico... You lovely island...
"Island of tropical breezes. Always the pineapples growing,
"Puerto Rico... You ugly island...
"Island of tropic diseases. Always the hurricanes blowing,
"Yes. I know your sacrifice. The gangs that rove your streets. The Jets and Sharks that circle your shores in the big, wet ocean, preventing our invincible FEMA marines from landing there in the middle of the Atlantis, where you are. It's big and wet, but we still come to your aid. Even though FEMA is only for real Americans. #FakeAmericans.
"Our forces are doing a bang up job. Texas. Louisiana. Florida. FEMA saved Mar A Lago. God bless 'em. You've got to think about the children of America, doing the child labor tasks that only they, with their tiny hands and no advocacy groups, can do. I can only wish that on the rest of them, poor blighters. Make America Gilded-Age Again.
"But puerto Rico, you can't expect a handout. You're not Wall Street or the Defense Department, you know. And not just because you've been mean to me. I can take it. Even though you are. No. But there must be a reckoning. We all know about the Puerto Rican gangs terrorizing New York with their knives and their singing and dancing. Hardly a fire escape is safe. Let alone the drug stores. There has to be some payback here. Not that I wouldn't like to grab that Maria's piñata. Am I right, boys? #LockerRoomTalk.
"So I will be sending in General Schrank to oversee the mess you people made here all by yourselves. Don't thank me. You don't deserve him, of course. You brought this all down upon your own heads, but hey! I'm nothing if I'm not compassionate. Schranky will do a wonderful job. A beautiful job. A bang up job telling me what a wonderful job I'm doing. And, let me tell you. That's true patriotism. That's true leadership. A true American. You can learn from him. #NotAmerican.
"By the way, do you have any golf courses?"
"Island of tropical breezes. Always the pineapples growing,
"Puerto Rico... You ugly island...
"Island of tropic diseases. Always the hurricanes blowing,
"Yes. I know your sacrifice. The gangs that rove your streets. The Jets and Sharks that circle your shores in the big, wet ocean, preventing our invincible FEMA marines from landing there in the middle of the Atlantis, where you are. It's big and wet, but we still come to your aid. Even though FEMA is only for real Americans. #FakeAmericans.
"Our forces are doing a bang up job. Texas. Louisiana. Florida. FEMA saved Mar A Lago. God bless 'em. You've got to think about the children of America, doing the child labor tasks that only they, with their tiny hands and no advocacy groups, can do. I can only wish that on the rest of them, poor blighters. Make America Gilded-Age Again.
"But puerto Rico, you can't expect a handout. You're not Wall Street or the Defense Department, you know. And not just because you've been mean to me. I can take it. Even though you are. No. But there must be a reckoning. We all know about the Puerto Rican gangs terrorizing New York with their knives and their singing and dancing. Hardly a fire escape is safe. Let alone the drug stores. There has to be some payback here. Not that I wouldn't like to grab that Maria's piñata. Am I right, boys? #LockerRoomTalk.
"So I will be sending in General Schrank to oversee the mess you people made here all by yourselves. Don't thank me. You don't deserve him, of course. You brought this all down upon your own heads, but hey! I'm nothing if I'm not compassionate. Schranky will do a wonderful job. A beautiful job. A bang up job telling me what a wonderful job I'm doing. And, let me tell you. That's true patriotism. That's true leadership. A true American. You can learn from him. #NotAmerican.
"By the way, do you have any golf courses?"
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