The Headmaster’s School of Dullards and Drudgery!

Send YOUR little darlings to the Headmaster’s School of Dullards and Drudgery! Where he and or she will learn valuable skills like, peeling potatoes! Having one’s only form of comfort ripped away from him! Pacing. Sitting alone! Absorbing blows! And preparing for life beneath the tropic sun or desert cold! Unless his brat sister rescues, I mean, retrieves him. 

Just look at our talented and dynamic faculty and staff. And for discipline, we use a real staff!

Headmaster Raucous Dumblebore. Who takes the soul
from soulless Dickensian nightmares.

   

‘Old’ Joe Snitchpocket. Groundskeeper
and dormitory monitor.

Christmas LaPasta. History teacher.

Frediwig. Dance instructor and
annoying nephew.

 The man with all the presents,

and his sidekick, Chuckles.

Our music teacher.

Directors of Fun and Cool Hats.

Future History teacher.

And her beautiful face.

 Old Joe and the rag pickers four.

Two of our stellar alums.

 Kid who stole my glasses.

Student having fun (we have so few of those.)

 Truant officers.

So, for a good time, commit your little ones to the Headmaster’s School of Dullards and Drudgery! Come for the beatings! Stay for the boredom!