So the Trumpflakes want me to get out of America because I won't support President Trump. OK. Fair enough. Let's see. I can go to the Ukraine where my Russian maternal grandfather came from over a hundred years ago. Oops. That's where Victoria Nuland, Assistant Secretary of State, bragged about spending five billion dollars to overthrow the Ukrainian government and installing a puppet regime that is hostile to Russians. It kicked up that whole civil war and stuff. Guess I can't go there. I'd still be in the American sphere of influence.
I could go to Poland where my mother's mother came from. Well, no. The US is pushing NATO power pieces through Poland to the Russian border. Not to mention major joint exercises in the Baltic Sea to counter all of that Russian aggression that they keep on doing within their own borders. Can't get out of America there.
Well, there's my father's heritage. English, Irish, Scott. Don't we have Trident submarine bases in the British Isles? And American service people all over the place? No fleeing gentle, stay at home, peace loving America there. Sorry. So far I just can't get out of America by going back to where I came from.
Hold it! My last green trump card! France! That's the last bit of my lazy, immigrant entitled, welfare defrauding, snowflake gimmy, gimmy-ing, freebie demanding, refugee ransacking relatives came from.
It seems that France doesn't have any American military bases there. How exciting! I can be kicked out of the Trumputopia for good. If only they could get out of NATO, the IMF, dollar hegemony, and the EU, they'd truly be out of the American sphere of influence. Gee, America just seems to be everywhere. Maybe the rest of the world should tell us to go home?
Sorry. Wherever I go up my immigrant family tree, I'm still in America's grasp.
Got any other ideas?